Interim show @ Chelsea 2014

Fig1

This work came about as previous work have an obvious (that is obvious to me) kinetic element to the work. I had made a strange body where the viewer is encouraged to bend over and look inside a bum-hole to view the animation inside. This act not only forced the viewer into a position of being some how apart of the work but also left the viewer vulnerable as they are bent over.

Fig2

Two days before I had been talking with peers about the work and it was discussed  that I should hide behind a bush and rush out naked when the work is being viewed.

Fig3

So I set about making this costume. with a rather large bird box that when necessary opens up to reveal a large penis. This is some what ambiguous which I think only adds to the piece.

Fig4

In future I intend not to walk around with the work but stay still as when I moved this distracted the person from viewing the work. As they became aware of there vulnerability.

Fig5

The animation was 'Tune in next week' a work inspired by Nathalie Djurberg http://www.zachfeuer.com/artists/nathalie-djurberg/ see fig14

Fig6

The feed back was encouraging the work was fun and interesting, although some people felt uncomfortable but I guess thats what the work does. It evokes extremes in people. 

Fig7

Looking at extreme Performance artist like Stelarc http://thequietus.com/articles/11469-stelarc-interview Ron Athey http://www.ronathey.com who also came into Chelsea and discussed his work.

Fig8

and Bob Flanagan who Why? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWtgdnuNiKQ also his installation work 'The Waiting Room' http://archive.newmuseum.org/index.php/Detail/Object/Show/object_id/4634

Fig9

This artist work is really powerful and moving this particular work 'Anxitey' is look at depression and a sense of being drowned by your very being... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofXumDHPxw0

Fig10

I was really concerned about the work as it felt understated Fig10 and without the usual bright colours associated with my work. It was challenge to accept that it was ok to put something in a gallery space that I might not be comfortable with.

Fig11
Although I enjoyed the performance I did feel the running up to people was to distarcting, while this was also ok I just felt that it was not where I wanted to take the work.  Fig11 and Fig 12

Fig12

Its was also interesting when a peer told me that I have a great body, I was shocked by this statement as I don't see this. One of the reasons for using myself and my own body is because it is imperfect and not the prefect shape or has a defined. Its my normal body with a weight issue that goes up and down that due to lack of exercise is out of shape and not well maintained. I used to swim a lot but can no longer afford to do this. I do cycle as much as possible... I have been looking at artist who use their own bodies in Art Yang Zhichao https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOSfcWZlupo who has collaborated and been taught by the Aiwewe

Fig13

Brian Chalkley said there are clubs for people to dress up like this, But I want to show my work in places that are probably not so obvious in doing so I challenge the viewer and my self. I have just read 'The Explicit Body in Performance' really interesting book by Rebecca Schneider looking at artist like Annie Sprinkle and Carolee Schneemann who's work were seen by the art establishment as Naive and Narcissistic out of touch with the new reformed art and a convenient cleaning up of the Advant Guarde that was according to the art establishment no longer in vougue.

Fig14

The work was just letting go and enjoying myself. It was liberating and fun.

Fig15

Berlin 2014 with friends from Chelsea + Art and shows visited

Will Reid made these T-shirt for the both of us as we had planned to share a bunk bed. We had so much fun, as well as looking at art. I was looking for work or more information about Andrea Franko but found this instead http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2580260/Artist-paints-womans-entire-body-make-look-like-parrot.html#v-3338477351001

With Kelly Sweeney... We went to http://www.smb.museum/en/museums-and-institutions/hamburger-bahnhof/home.html  Nassive place with a large exhibition of Joseph Beuys work http://www.walkerart.org/archive/4/9C43FDAD069C47F36167.htm

With Henry Gardiner & Jinjoo Kim. I liked the work of Jonathan Monk and the humour in his work http://www.walkerart.org/archive/4/9C43FDAD069C47F36167.htm He had Small Puppets in the entrance of the Hamburger Bahnhof

also with Nalini Thapen. Also really liked the work of Ceal Foyer http://www.lissongallery.com/artists/ceal-floyer She had made a pattern around the edge of the room with an image of a small pair of scissors behind a magnifying glass. I liked the reference to Alice in wonderland and a large print with small scissors...

This place was empty, Maybe it was in the sign.... Also seen work by Dieter Roth & Bjorn Roth http://www.hauserwirth.com/exhibitions/1649/dieter-roth-bjorn-roth/view/

Urinal near our Hostel East Seven http://www.eastseven.de great stay and very clean, We thought people and waiters were rude, until we found out that its just the way they are. Loved the street Kastanienallee street where we met Alex and her partner, We also had the most amazing falafel and a late night drink  in a bar down this road.

We went to MONSTERKABINETT https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5UbqPdefmM roshenthalstrabe39. Near Anne Frank Museum.

Berliner Dom was on Museum Island although I never went into any of the museums I enjoyed a walk around them

We visited the Monument of Jews who lost their lives in the 2 work war.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memorial_to_the_Murdered_Jews_of_Europe

Aei Weiweie Evidence a look at the work inspired mostly by the incarceration by the Chinese Government https://www.berlinerfestspiele.de/en/aktuell/festivals/gropiusbau/programm_mgb/mgb14_ai_wei_wei/ausstellung_ai_weiwei/veranstaltungsdetail_80214.php

'To-Let' looking at toilet graffiti...

I have been collecting toilet graffiti for a few year, I like the fact you can find it anywhere. You can get a sense of the underbelly of a place through the shocking and honest text on the wall...

I was sexually abused when I was 8 years old and from the age of 10 I was frequenting toilets looking for sex... and my abuser, as it was something I enjoyed. That does not mean it was ok. I was to young and did not really understand what was happening. I had grown up feeling that I had no control over...

I remember once leaving a toilet and heading home on my bike this guy in a van stopped and offered me a lift. I said, I was ok thanks and he asked which way I was heading at the mini roundabout ahead. I lied and said straight on. He drove in that direction and I peddled as hard as I could going left up a steep hill...

I met this guy in the toilets at Rugby and he came back to mine and he fucked me, I was so disgusted and ashamed. I showered and told myself I would never do that again...

These are some of the things I have found while visiting public toilets.

But that feeling never lasted long as I had a natural attraction to men... when I was 15 I told my Mum I was gay and she sent me to see a shrink... she said "your to nice to be gay" which was a relief to my Mum and I tried to date girls... I stopped trying when I was 24...

I have been trying to think of away of bringing my work togethe, by way of telling a story. Like Joseph Beuys or Louise Bourgeois, I have decided the best stories are the truth, what ever that is... but I hope it gives a better understanding, of why I make the art that I do.

Mary Midgley describes in 'Beast and Man' how we constantly look back into the past trying to make sense and form patterns of why we do those things... how patterns express who we are or at least a part of who we are...

I constantly find myself going over old work and ideas not really sure why! but through the process of breaking apart and re-building I'm able to mend and make stronger. Thats probably what I was doing with using sex in the work. As sex was the only thing that really gave me any power, I left school with no qualifications and I was ok looking. I used sex to break away from the sexual abuse of my farther and the physical and verbal abuse of my Mother.

 My mother constantly told me and my sister that we were stupid and would never amount to much. When your told this enough times you believe it... It was only when I met Dave and he actually believed in me that I started to believe in my self...

 I knew that when i grew up I would be able to leave the hell I was living in...  my coping strategy was to always look froward to the future. To plan and do things that would make me happy. My Nan was my rock and showed me another way of living... to be humble and not to get to involved in anything or anyone...

 I suppose I was to busy surviving to even notice that there were other things more important going on in the world... I had no aspirations... I flitted from one job to the next and relationship to relationship. But I had fun and sex was always a great escape the more I got the more I wanted.

 It has been said that my art is no more than a banner in a protest but what is art if not a protest and a way of getting people to think differently about things...

 sex is no-longer a driving force in my life, but away away pushing boundaries. "what we know of the world, is what we know of ourselves" James Joyce